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Pretending to serve up some dongdongju.

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Dear Friends Who Only Look at This Blog via Google Buzz/Reader,

For more aesthetically pleasing photo-viewing, do your eyes a favor and click the link that takes you to the actual blog! For real, all these snow & ice pictures against the hideous white Buzz default background? The black does wonders, especially for the especially crappy pictures. It's just one more click; you won't be sorry.

Big thanks & big love from Corea!

Alexandra Faye

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Coldest day in 75 years = weather for two!

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... wheeeee?

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Remember that thing I sAid about thirsting for color? You could always just visit Woz at her apartment. Or anywhere clothing and/or accessories &/or bikes are required, really.

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Mom has been comparing me to a file for 28 years.

Uh, thanks?

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Thirsting for color in this washed out season? Quench among the lotus lanterns and golden statues and flickering candles and vibrant ceiling in a Buddhist temple. Oh yum.

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We hiked up a frozen mountain (Seodaesan -- "the Great Mountain of the West") to bow to the Buddhist mountain gods on the coldest day recorded in 75 years (-20C). This (temporary?) bout of insanity will (gd better!) ensure our safety on future mountain trekking etc. in 2011.

Hot food, magkoli, and Dewar's never tasted so good.

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Lunch.

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That's Yuna.

We're going ice pishing, then skiing, then sauna-ing, with 3 other crazies this weekend.

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Dutch graffitis, for Yuna.

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People's feet do funny things when their owners are commuting.

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Olympic Park @Jamsil in SE Seoul , directly adjacent to the designated graffitis wall that is, sadly, not even full up. I wish this sign would have also been fair game for the artists.

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Primary colors!!

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Dennis is seven Korean age, so he's really six. He speaks better English than 5 of the 11 Korean teachers at our school, and often tries to take over the class, translating to his classmates when we're trying to explain a game or something. Chris told me that Dennis came up to him one day after our elevator/escalator science lesson and told him that escalators are far superior to elevators. Why? Because you don't have to wait for them, you just walk onto the moving stairs, and they take you up, and you can walk up them if you want to go faster.

He's my favorite.

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Man, I need to go back to this mask shop when my skillz improve.

(And getting geared up to play a wicked jab!)

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Olympic Park at Jamsil in Seoul, January 8th, 2011, from a moving bicycle*.

*Yeah, it's true, I am now the proud owner of a big, fast, heavy, gorgeous picture-takin device. This year I'm testing out this new thing called better judgment, and it told me to leave the equipment at home the night of seafood & wine buffet. Good thing I listened, cause I vaguely recall snow angels, which still require horizontal full-body snow-touching. There was also a mysterious red skin thing on my left palm the next morning. I know, nobody cares, but I feel the need to explain pictures of questionable quality: some will continue to come from my handy dandy pocket store-able Samsung slide hand phone. Thanks for understanding.

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01.01.11

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Will someone please tell me wtf a Ford Econoline 150 conversion van is doing in Korea‽

Especially one that is stenciled with a Danielsville, Georgia logo of some sort, from a used car dealership, I presume?

Koreans certainly have a "healthy" infatuation for all things over-sized, gluttonous and fashionable *ahem COSTCOs, iPads, Mini Coopers, Louis Vuitton bags, fixies worth more than a single-eye lasik procedure everywhere* but this van is more out of place than a 6-foot-tall white girl tryin to buy socks at a subway station in a densely populated Asian metropolis.

Ya reckon it belongs to some army person who tried to bring their Dirty South to the East, conveniently using the 8 MPG beast to shuttle the kids around the army base to the American grocerystoreschooldininghallswimming poolsoccerfieldweightroomapartmentstarbucksapartmentstoreetc? Whateva you gotta do to keep them patriots happy, ready on the balls of their feet, bouncing from right to the left and back, crackin phalanges, poised to pounce at the drop of a ... bomb. I guess.

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Meeeeow.

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Woz, Frankie, graffitis, snow, piped-in music, an over-sized portrait of a dude makin explicit gestures with his hand, Saturday afternoon turdery, the ush.

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1/1/11. Seoul. Goin up the hill to the Tower.

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Dang. Check out them pearly whites. I reckon she uses Crest or somethin else fancy what comes in a tube. Not like my bakin soder n peroxide. Whoooeeee!

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Nail polish! Smart phones! Legwarmers on the wrists! Various shades of blue! 1/1/11!! Wheeeeee!!!

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Can't. Stop. Watching. Dexter.

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06 NOV 2010

So last Wednesday, a few friends and I decided to get some delicious spicy grilled octopus for dinner after work. It also happened to be the last night my couchsurfer Ben would be in Seoul, so we wanted to show him a good time. In true korean style, maekju (beer) and soju were heavily consumed at the restaurant, before makin moves to a funny private-cubicle bar across the street. (The bar is called Dorothy's Diary. A really, really creepy blonde mannequin is positioned at a table in the foyer, wearing sunglasses and Barbie-fashion clothing, her arm in a permanent "hello!" gesture, her head slightly cocked to one side. The wallpaper and other decor looks like it should be in a doll house. *shiver*) Naturally, multiple 2.7 liter pitchers were ordered, drinking games ensued, and we stumbled out of the odd drinking establishment in time to catch the last subway. Part of the group went downstairs and outside while Hannah, Ben and I emptied our bladders. I was convinced that everyone else had descended ALL of the stairs, into the basement noraebang (singin room -- Korean karaoke), so the peeing crew followed me down to find them, doubting my idea the whole way. When I figured out they were right, a few steps into the hall of the noraebang, I started running, trying to lose them in the hall-maze, then trying to hide so I could scare them. Completely logical, I know, seeing as how I haven't a single fast-twitch muscle in my body, and they were miiiiles behind me (about 3 steps). Up ahead, I saw the perfect opportunity to gain another step, action- and/or thriller-movie style: run through the open door, then close it behind me, so my pursuers have to open it again, thus, slowing them down (in)significantly. Somewhere between the hall and the stairs, in the doorway where one would expect, a 'floor-jam' somehow became a brick wall against my toe, stopping the movement of at least one of my feet, but not getting the better of inertia against my many kilos of body mass and six feet of person, sending me flying through the air, landing on my stomach, and sliding across the floor, in flying squirrel position. Sometimes, I can be unbelievably graceful.

Here's to another year of turdery and more reasons to point and laugh at it... or at least 228 more days of telling it to the Internets.

Coming soon: "2011, I will make you my bitch!" list!

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... starting with you, flour-filled balloon squeezy toy.

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2011, I will make you my bitch. Happy merry New Year!